I know you are in rainbows and the glitter in the snow,
How is it I miss someone I never got to know?
I can see you tiny fingers and recall touching your toes,
Wishing you would take a breath, you were just not meant to grow,
At least not as my little one, perfect in tiny form,
I want to embrace those memories finding somewhere warm,
But my tears fall cold; and winter is too near;
Resisting the sadness quickly blocked by fear,
This does not honour you nor connect me to true self,
You are so much more than the memory box sitting on a shelf,
You remind of my strength and that I can face nightmares on my own,
Now to reach out through my pain and accept I’m not alone.
Sorrow is a process that is not within control,
Resistance and isolation is what will take its toll,
Allowing for the heartbreak to come then wash away,
Will help me to see your presence in my everyday,
I will recognize your spirit lives in all of nature’s gifts
I will allow the pain that’s mine with faith that spirit lifts,
You exist always in the love you brought my heart,
That can never be lost, it existed deeply from the start.